The Purpose Post, Summer ‘21

27 Aug

Hey everyone, happy northern hemisphere summer!!! ☺ I know for those in Australia and New Zealand it’s not feeling very summer right now but for everyone else, really hope you are getting a little bit of downtime. I can’t believe its pretty much the end of AUGUST!! 8 months into 2021 – more down than left to go!

Singapore and Asia generally this isn’t a quiet time.. so it takes some discipline to pause and take holidays. I think luckily school holidays were designed for children, teachers and parents alike as my children being on holiday gives me a mandatory reason to sloooow down.

I’ve just had a lovely week off and made a conscious effort to keep my July and early August diary a bit lighter. At the time I’m writing this we are STILL in lockdown in Singapore, no restaurants open but strangely other things are and I had a nice week going to the Zoo with my youngest son and museum with my older son – two split shifts as we can still only be groups of two people.

This lockdown segment feels especially hard when I look across the world and imagine the summer holidays we’d be having with friends and family in the UK if only we were allowed to travel and able to gain re-entry to Singapore.

To be honest this last 6-8 weeks has possibly been the toughest time of my Singapore COVID experience. It does all feel very controlled and stuck in Singapore and whilst I totally understand the rationale, the personal consequences and deep longing to see those you love dearly far away its hard.

Coupled with all the goodbyes, so many goodbyes…. More goodbyes in the last month than in the last 10 years of being in Singapore.

So … and breathe, this week off has been nothing exciting just not rushing, catching up with friends in small groups of 2 per day and just slowing right down and doing some being versus doing.

I’ve realised I’m not very good at resting…. I’m probably most comfortable moving forward and being productive…

So this month’s newsletter is July & August combined – Summer Purpose Post… inspired by all sorts of summery things and resting and creativity and deep play! ☺

Summer Thoughts

01. Reading

Things I love doing over summer breaks is reading. My absolute summer must read recommendation is The Midnight Library – Matt Haig, he’s a UK author who has his very beautiful messy life story about how aged 24 he wanted to kill himself.

Now he is an uber successful novelist, he teaches the readers of his books – and his children – how to get through when the future looks bleak.

I won’t spoil the story line, apart from to say it’s a perfect read for these rollercoaster times and one to add to your summer reading list. It’s definitely a book which makes you think and reflect a lot even more so if you have any history of family or personal mental health challenges in your story.

Also love his other beautiful book The Comfort Book.. so so many beautiful quotes and stories one that really stood out for me during these times is below…

02. Listening & Walking

One of the gifts of the pandemic for me was no travel. Whilst this has also been a struggle it has also been a gift. Prior to COVID 19 I travelled quite a lot for work. It was enjoyable but it is not until you stop doing it that you realise what a massive impact it has on all aspects of your lifestyle. 2020 and into 2021 was the most time I have ever slept in my own bed over the past 10 years!!

What that also meant was I was able to get into a routine that I haven’t ever able to do before. I was also able to work out what I like doing and how to build and combine healthy habits into my life.

So my combination is walking + podcasts or audible books. I get so much more of my favourite things reading and learning done at the same time as my other favourite thing which is walking – sometimes I go out for a walk to listen, other times I’m listening so I will encourage myself to walk. Either way it works for me and I’ve ‘read’ more, walked more and generally happy with myself that its now a healthy habit which I can’t give up!

Over the past couple of days I’ve binged listened to Six part summer sister series on Brene Brown’s Unlocking Us Podcast. It’s just a lovely chat with 3 sisters talking about all their imperfections and how they and we all keep ourselves stuck.

I’m a recovering perfectionist and this was so nourishing for my soul to remind myself to keep letting everything go. If you need to be way less perfect and feel freer and more you - then definitely add the Gifts of Imperfection to your reading list - or if you’ve already read it then this podcast series is a brilliant audit and reminder of how far you’ve come!

Reminder of the 10 guideposts for wholehearted living from the book ….

For me the guideposts I’m still really working hard on are productivity and self-worth and turning this into more quality rest and play. It takes me such a while to really wind down and give myself permission to do nothing.

I think this definitely comes from my family upbringing, there was no time to rest. Being the oldest child of a single parent family, where sitting down and doing nothing was not welcomed as there was always something that someone needed help with, be that my Mum or my two younger brothers.

Over time I learned to help first and that doing anything for myself was optional if time was ever available which it never seemed to be. As a 44 year old grown up, I’m still learning how to rest and play and grateful that my two boys teach me how to do this well!!

The other one is self-doubt and ‘supposed to’ and how we can transmute this into meaningful work! I love my work life right now doing work that I love and that brings me joy and meaning, I just need to work harder on the self-doubt which kicks in all the time!

How about you? Which guideposts could be most helpful to you to help you live a more wholehearted life? Why not take the inventory and see how you come out? There are also lots of resources on Brene Brown’s gifts of imperfection hub.